Friday, February 6, 2015

To any of my friends who may be thinking of getting knocked up

Since I'm home sick from work today I have some time to share some thoughts on pregnancy so far. I haven't really taken a bunch of cute belly pictures with different types of fruits or written a week by week summary of my feelings and experiences thus far and I probably won't. Cause I'm lazy. And basically I've only really started to look pregnant this week.

I want to be real with you. Being pregnant is amazing and weird and hard and exciting all at the same time. No one really tells you what it's like until you're already in the club. For some reason everything is like a big secret that all of the moms decided to keep from non-moms. I'm not like that. I'm way too honest.

First Trimester



  • When you find out you're pregnant you get flooded with emotions and probably hormones that make you cry. I found out I was pregnant by borrowing a pee test from my friend Megan who was eight months pregnant at the time. I figured she didn't need it anymore... When she handed me the test in the little wrapper thing she said "you know you have to tell me now right?" I went upstairs and peed on it and the result came but I didn't have the instructions or the box. I took a picture of it and sent it to Megan. "Is this positive? I can't tell." She said yes and then I started freaking out. David was at work so I wanted to wait until he got home to tell him in a cute way. Well I only waited like 30 minutes. I called him and told him while he was at work. Really romantic. So there it is. My best friend knew I was pregnant before my husband. Fail.
  • After you find out you're pregnant you go from wanting to yell it at everyone you meet to not wanting to tell anyone and then back again. There's the excitement but there's also the feeling like something could go wrong and maybe I'm not allowed to be excited yet. Those 12 weeks are looong my friends.
  • When you first find out you're pregnant you want to live in a healthy bubble where there's organic food all the time and no one is blowing secondhand smoke in your face. You also are very careful when walking ice and you drive slower. This doesn't last forever. I had decided that I was going to go without my sugar my whole pregnancy but I just ate two popsicles while I was writing this.
  • Your boobs hurt all the time! And they grow like two cup sizes in a month. Your nipples get really big and dark and gross too. The boob hurting thing really cramps your style because also for some reason pregnancy makes you really horny.
  • The crying for no reason is real too. One time David told me that I was beautiful and I started bawling ugly tears for no reason.
  • Diarrhea all day every day.
  • Morning sickness all day everyday. There's something to be said that the smell of someone's own poop can make them throw up. That happened to me. Twice. 
  • You have to pee every five minutes. Even if you haven't really had anything to drink. (Wow the last three have all been about the bathroom... sorry guys)
  • Food aversions. There were times that I literally couldn't think of something that I wanted to eat at all. If I found something it was most likely carbs.
Second Trimester
  • I'm really lucky and I haven't had morning sickness in my second trimester. I also haven't had heartburn yet. Knock on wood.
  • Your boobs keep growing. Yes it's possible... but they don't hurt as bad. For some reason they are now really itchy and veiny. Super sexy amiright? Amazingly enough, your husband will still think so.
  • At the beginning of the second trimester you don't really feel pregnant anymore once the morning sickness is gone. I only feel pregnant again at 18 weeks because I have a bump and my back hurts.
  • You can't poop.
  • You get a runny nose at 16 weeks that doesn't go away probably ever.
  • People always ask how you're feeling. I always say I feel good even though all I want to say is, "I feel constipated and fat and my back hurts."

My point in writing this is not to complain about or diminish the beauty of creating a human. I just want to tell the truth. It's messy, emotional, and unlike anything else. I love being pregnant and I would never trade any of the hard parts for something easier. I just accept it as part of the territory and know it is all worth it.




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